my mom & Noah putting Christmas flowers out for Rowan & Levi
Thursday, December 22, 2011
Some days are just so dadgum hard. Still, after all this time...yes, the days are just hard. I spend all day looking, loving, tending to my son...all day missing those who didn't make it...and knowing that because they didn't make it here...he is here. He is a miracle child. A true gift. And, yet, I miss them still...so much more now it seems. I think I somehow thought that it would be easier when Noah was here, or at least that I wouldn't have as much time to dwell on those gone too soon. I guess maybe it's also because it's nearly Christmas and rather than 3 sweet little cherubs filling my home with squeals of laughter, I have only one. And, I am so glad to have the one....but I still miss Rowan & Levi. Does it really ever get easier?