Wednesday, May 4, 2011

Rabbit Hole, a brief review

Wow.  I finally saw 'Rabbit Hole.'  This movie stars Nicole Kidman & Aaron Eckhart.  I am still trying to wrap my mind around all that I took in.  It was incredible to see my grief, anger, etc, etc, etc, displayed all too accurately on the screen.  Although the child in the movie dies in a completely (yet still horribly) different way than my children died, wow...  Outstanding.  I wish I'd had the courage to see the film in theaters, but I knew I'd be a blubbering idiot... I found here a nice review of the film, and probably a better place to get the facts than from myself - so that I don't spoil anything.  Also, here, on rotten tomatoes.
I felt each tense moment, because I too had lived those moments.  I knew, all too well, the depth of each painful encounter with people from all over the momma's life.  I could literally feel the agony she had when talking with her family, and I know that look that her husband carried around on his face - as I'd seen it so many times on Matt's face.  It was an outstanding, amazing, devastating, portrayal of the grief process, the 'trying to hold it together' process, and the 'saving your marriage' process.

I cried out watching her remember 'that day.'  I had to pause the film and sob a few times, but I bravely made it through.  You know what my favorite part was...  There was no fairy tale ending.  Things didn't just 'magically' get all better, and go back to 'normal.'  It was a real, honest, gritty look at two people who love each other - losing the only other person they loved quite as much.  Just like my life has been...the same places of hurt that I have visited these last 2 years, the same places of blame, grief, anger, and trying to heal.

I am sad to say that rather than relying on God, the mother tends to look toward 'other' more scientific explanations for dealing with her grief - and once you see the film, and learn of her reasons you will understand more, I am trying not to totally ruin the movie.  I guess it isn't that she negates God for science, although she is angry and I am sure that she does not believe in God - but, well, you will just have to watch it.  I think I would have felt an ever deeper connection to the film and the portrayal had the family been a family of faith.  But, like I's raw and honest, and not everyone has a faith in God.

Anyhow, I will leave you with a link to the trailer, and my favorite quote:

Becca (Nicole Kidman): Does it ever go away?

Nat (Dianne Wiest - Nicole Kidman's mother in the film) : No, I don't think it does. Not for me, it hasn't - has gone on for eleven years. But it changes though.

Becca: How?

Nat: I don't know... the weight of it, I guess. At some point, it becomes bearable. It turns into something that you can crawl out from under and... carry around like a brick in your pocket. And you... you even forget it, for a while. But then you reach in for whatever reason and - there it is. Oh right, that. Which could be aweful - not all the time. It's kinda...  not that you'd like it exactly, but it's what you've got instead of your son. So, you carry it around. And uh... it doesn't go away. Which is...

Becca: Which is what?

Nat: Fine, actually.

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